Dyslexia, Anxiety & Shame: How to Rebuild Your Confidence in Leicester, Hinckley & Online

Martin Middleton
Feb 3
4 min read

Dyslexia in Adults: The Hidden Struggle

If you prefer to listen see below for the audio version of this post.

Dyslexia isn't just about mixing up letters or struggling with spelling. It’s the knot in your stomach when you’re asked to read aloud. It's the secret fear that you are 'lazy' or 'stupid'—even when you know logically that you aren't.

You have spent years masking your struggles, but the anxiety of being 'found out' is exhausting.

For people who haven't experienced these things it can be hard for them to comprehend how you don't just get it - because their brain just does “get” it in a world designed for and by them.

The "School Trauma" Connection (Why You Feel This Way)

The first time I heard the word dyslexic from from a teacher, reading in class he told me “it’s time to stop with this dyslexic nonsense now Martin”. I didn’t know what dyslexic was but I knew it must be bad and I shouldn’t be it. That feeling of being something wrong / not good stuck with me.

Many adults have similar stories and carry emotional scars from school. Often the feeling of "humiliation" follows you into adulthood. You might have been labeled "stupid" - you may have made the survival decision that being called “lazy” was better than being humiliated or found out.

Constant correction and comparison to peers might have led you to really believe that "I am not enough." or "I'm incompetent"

A 2023 research study found that dyslexic individuals were twice as likely to suffer from anxiety and depression than those without dyslexia. (Xiao et al., 2023). This impact on the mental health of dyslexic individuals is often downplayed, ignored or dismissed and not given the attention needed on in therapy setting. A therapist, unless they understand the impact if can have on a dyslexic individual may inadvertently not value you lived experience.

How this follows you into Adulthood

Those early years experience have followed you into later life and have a profound impact on the ways you feel about yourself here and now. Do any of these Common Signs of Dyslexia-Induced Anxiety feel familiar to you:

The "Imposter phenomenon" (syndrome): you are highly intelligent and/or successful but live in constant fear of being "found out." Your success is luck rather than ability, you might feel constantly exhausted as you try to prove you belong.

Performance Anxiety: Someone in the meeting gets the whiteboard out and wants you to use it? You're given a document at short notice and expected to quickly digest and summarise? You get that pit of your gut feeling, it might spread to your palms as they start to sweat - your thoughts start to spiral.

Learned Helplessness: Do you procrastinate? Put things off for as long as possible as they build up until it’s too late. Do you have a deep fear of failure which means you avoid situations or give up because you’ll just get it wrong?

Treating Dyslexia Anxiety with CBT and Hypnotherapy

If any of these sound familiar I can help you explore these thoughts and feelings and find new ways of talking to yourself. We can work to reframe those instinctive negative thoughts and feelings.

While spellcheckers and AI tools can help with the practical side of dyslexia, they cannot fix the emotional toll it takes. Software can correct a typo, but it can’t stop your heart from racing when you have to hit "send."

Everyone is unique and so is their journey in therapy. Here is just an outline of what it could look like if we worked together:

1. Mapping Your "Anxiety Clock" (CBT)

2. Re-Writing the Past and Self Acceptance

A surreal and emotional artistic illustration of a therapy concept. Two large cinema screens standing side by side in a dark void. On the left screen is a scene of a sad, lonely child sitting in a classroom. On the right screen is a confident adult. The adult is physically stepping out of their screen, crossing the gap, and reaching into the left screen to hug and comfort the child.

Many adults with dyslexia are still carrying the pain of childhood memories of being humiliated by a teacher . Using Hypnotherapy, we can look at these old memories in a deeply relaxed state. We use a technique called "Rescripting," where your adult self steps into that memory to comfort and protect your younger self. This helps "detoxify" the shame, correcting the false belief that you were ever "dumb." You were simply a child with a different kind of brain in a system that didn't understand you and in many cases worked against you. You give that younger version of yourself the love and support it needed helping to change your story going forwards.

3. Moving from "Victim" to "Thriver"

We work on Cognitive Restructuring. We challenge the old equation that Dyslexia = Incompetence. We look for evidence of your "Islands of Competence" - these are the creativity, problem-solving skills, and resilience you built because of your dyslexia. We work to move you from a story of "surviving" to a story of "thriving," where dyslexia is no longer a shameful secret, but simply one part of a resilient, successful you.